7 Inappropriate Confessions

Prepare for disappointment. Not inappropriate in the sense of scintillating tales of moral indiscretion, rather inappropriate in that these are things I shouldn't feel any need to confess, and yet... I do. Almost daily.



1. I cannot finish a half gallon of milk before it expires. I've been trying for years, and while I have flirted in the high ninety-percents of completion, I have yet to seal the deal.

2. I never completed Super Mario Brothers, and I really, really tried. It was the only video game I owned for a year.



3. I hate and cannot stand reality tv--in fact I've never watched an entire reality tv show on my own--and yet, filled with some self-loathing, I have watched hours of it because of female companionship. (There is one exception to this, but that I will not confess.)

4. I don't know what band you are talking about. Furthermore, it took me a few minutes to figure out you were talking about a band.

5. I haven't seen the movie your talking about, and there is a 90% chance I really don't want to--it's violent, hyper sexual, inane and/or people say bad swears a lot.

6. But I would still watch Caveman, staring Shelly Long and Ringo Starr, and I am well aware that it falls into at least two of the above criteria.



7. I've seen the movie Caveman.

Musing on Modern Life

This:

"I'm sorry. I'm no longer interested. You are simply not as good looking or nearly as skinny as your internet photographs led me to believe."

Should be a valid way to end a relationship. (Whether or not the internet is a valid place to begin a relationship is a whole other matter recognized hereby, but not addressed herein.)



Somehow we are currently in a social landscape where one can wantonly and willfully deceive, but it's not ok for the the deceived to acknowledge the deception. Thus, making a victim twice over.

At least with alcohol people traditionally brought deception upon themselves.

Ironically the information age has promoted only the artful presentation of information, often misinformation, and has eroded the kind of genuine discovery and fact-finding that comes from real-life human contact and interaction. This kind of freedom to misrepresent is at an all time high.

I'm sure this has more troubling ramifications than determinations of "hot or not," but I'm a simple man, and am merely endeavoring to point out the surface of the iceberg. (Which, considering where this post began, seems an apt analogy.)